Date: April 28, 2025

Author: Emily Johnson

I’ve been part of a friend group for as long as I can remember. There are five of us, and I’m always the one left on the outside. We all have our little roles, and I guess I’m the number 5. There’s this girl, let’s call her Number 4, and she’s who I talk to the most. She’s the one I can always rely on to have a decent conversation with, but it doesn’t feel like enough.

The thing is, there’s this mini unit within our group – Number 1, Number 2, and Number 3. They’re always together, laughing, chatting, and making their own plans. Whenever any of us tries to join in, they’re either on their phones or just not really paying attention. It’s like they have their own world that no one can get into, and the rest of us are just left hanging.

I remember this one time when I was working on a dance presentation with one of the girls from that mini unit. It was supposed to be a group effort, but the only person who got praise afterward was her. She was the one who was hugged, the one who received all the compliments from the others. I was just left there, smiling awkwardly, trying to brush off the sting.

Things didn’t really change after that. I remember trying to go to a party once. I was excited, thinking maybe this time they’d want to hang out, but as usual, no one was interested in going with me. Then, last minute, someone else invited them, and suddenly they all decided to go. It stung. It always does. I don’t know why I let it bother me, but I can’t help it.

It’s like I’m always on the edge of everything — close enough to be a part of the group but never truly included. I can’t help but feel like I’m just there, existing in the background of their lives while they go on with their own.