April 25, 2025
by Keira Lynn Morales

Lately, I’ve been feeling… weird. And I don’t mean “something’s-wrong” weird. More like, “I-don’t-know-who-I-am” weird. There’s this surge of something inside me—love? Admiration? Obsession? Whatever it is, it’s directed at my English teacher. Yeah. Her.

She’s smart, kind, kind of sarcastic in a cool way, and when she talks about books or writing, it feels like the whole class disappears. I guess what freaks me out the most is that she’s a woman. And so am I.

I’ve always considered myself straight. I’ve never really questioned it before. But this feeling is something I can’t shake. Maybe it’s not love-love. Maybe I just want to be around her because she sees me. She really sees me. She gives me chances to speak, compliments my work, and sometimes it feels like she’s one of the few people who actually understands what I’m saying.

My classmates tease me a little—they say I’m her favorite because I’m “good at English,” whatever that means. But the truth is, when I’m in her class, I feel important. I feel smart. I feel like I matter. And maybe I’ve been chasing that feeling without realizing it.

It’s not like I don’t get love at home. My family’s supportive, and my friends are great. But this? This feels different. It’s not about needing attention—I get plenty. I just think… I’m drawn to her in a way I don’t fully understand yet.

I don’t know if this means something bigger about who I am. Or if it’s just a phase, a crush, a moment of admiration that’ll fade like the others eventually have. But I’m not going to beat myself up over it. Not anymore.

Whatever this feeling is, it’s real. Maybe not forever—but right now, yeah. It’s there.