Date: April 22, 2025
Author: Sophie Langford

I never thought I’d be the person to get a simple morning routine wrong, but here we are.

It all started with my usual frantic rush. I’m one of those people who always seems to leave five minutes later than planned, no matter how much I swear the night before that I’ll get up earlier. So there I was, half-blind with sleep, trying to get dressed and be presentable for work in under ten minutes. As usual, I was cursing the universe as I rummaged around my bathroom.

I grabbed what I thought was my spray deodorant—no time to double-check the label—and sprayed it on, blissfully unaware of what was about to unfold. At first, I didn’t even notice the scent. It just seemed… pleasant? Something tropical, maybe coconut? But as I finished with my second arm, I paused and thought, “That’s odd… why does this smell more like vacation than freshness?”

I shrugged it off and went about my business, thinking the scent would fade. But then the feeling hit me. I felt… wrong. Like my armpits were oddly heavy. Chalky. Not fresh and smooth, but weirdly… powdery? That’s when I looked down and realized my mistake.

Instead of deodorant, I had grabbed my dry shampoo spray. The one with “Maximum Hold” on the label. Which, by the way, is perfect for keeping hair in place, but not for preventing body odor. I had basically transformed my underarms into white, powdery snowdrifts that I could not rub off. The more I tried, the worse it got. I’m pretty sure I looked like I had rolled around in flour.

I ended up going to work with ghostly white pits and a whole lot of regret. The worst part? It stayed like that for hours, making me feel like I was walking around with a secret. A powdery, chalky, secret.

So yeah, moral of the story: always check your cans, especially when you’re running late. Otherwise, you might end up with the world’s most awkward deodorant fail.