Date: April 27, 2025
Author: Jason Walker

It started a few years ago, just out of curiosity. I was looking for a good massage, something to relax after a long week. But what I didn’t expect was how it all unfolded.

At first, I was nervous about the idea of a happy ending, but the excitement kept pulling me back. The feeling of guilt was there too, but after the first time, it didn’t feel like I could stop.

My wife doesn’t know about any of this. I’ve kept it a secret because I’m ashamed. But the addiction has taken root in me. I’ve visited countless places, done things I never thought I’d do, just chasing that feeling.

Now, I don’t know how to escape this cycle. It’s like I’m trapped between wanting to stop and not knowing how to. Part of me wants to quit, but part of me wonders if I should just accept it and keep going, maybe even enjoy it.

I’m lost, and I don’t know if I should reach out for help or just give in to what feels so hard to resist.