Date: April 28, 2025
Author: Sophie T. Reynolds
So, here I am, sitting in the middle of this mess, trying to figure out how I got myself into it. It’s honestly a bit ridiculous, but also… kind of funny. I mean, who does this happen to?
Okay, so here’s the thing. There’s this guy—let’s call him “Pillow,” just for the sake of keeping things light. And I know, I know, this is all so stupid, but I can’t help it. I have this huge crush on him, and I don’t even know why. It’s like my brain is playing tricks on me.
For a while, Pillow and I were really close friends. We texted constantly, talked about everything under the sun, shared all the random, silly stuff in our lives. He was one of my best guy friends, and honestly, I never even thought of him that way. Like, we were just friends, and that was it. Simple, right?
But then I got a boyfriend. Things shifted a bit, not that I noticed right away. You know how it is—when you’re in a relationship, you tend to pull back a little from your other friendships, especially with guys. I didn’t want to make my boyfriend uncomfortable, and I figured, “Hey, it’s just how things go.” So Pillow and I drifted apart a little. It wasn’t anything dramatic. We just stopped texting as much.
But here’s the kicker. A few nights ago, I had this dream. And not just any dream. In it, Pillow was my boyfriend. Like, for real. We were all cute and cozy, holding hands, laughing together. It felt so real. And then I woke up, and I was so happy—which was honestly terrifying. Why on earth am I waking up smiling because of a dream about my best friend? My best friend! This is not supposed to happen.
I kept telling myself, “Nope, that’s crazy. I have a boyfriend now. I’m happy with him.” But the more I thought about it, the more confused I got. The feelings for Pillow were never supposed to be like this. I mean, he’s great and all, but he’s Pillow. I’ve always known him as just a friend. So why is this suddenly messing with my head?
It’s like I can’t shake this weird mix of guilt and curiosity. I shouldn’t like him this way, right? I shouldn’t even be thinking about him like that. But then I think, maybe it’s just my mind playing games with me. Maybe I’m just craving something more exciting, more dramatic. Or maybe my brain is just bored and decided to go rogue.
I have no idea what to do with this. I don’t want to hurt anyone, especially not my boyfriend, but this whole situation feels so messed up. I keep wondering if I should talk to Pillow about it—if that’s even a good idea. But at the same time, I don’t want to risk ruining a perfectly good friendship for something that might just be a stupid phase.
So, yeah, I’m in a bit of a pickle. And I honestly have no clue what to do next. The whole thing is just… messy.
