April 24, 2025
By Evan Brooks

I don’t know where to start.
I guess the biggest thing is, I can’t trust her anymore.

My girlfriend has gone back to her ex multiple times. Every time she says it’s over, and every time, she finds her way back to him. I don’t know why I still hold on, but somehow I do. It’s like I’m stuck in this loop where I tell myself it’ll be different this time, but it never is.

And now? I can’t shake the feeling that I don’t even care anymore. That part of me that once got jealous or hurt, now feels numb. Maybe I’ve just gotten used to it. Maybe I’ve convinced myself that it’s just easier to let it happen than to keep fighting for something that doesn’t seem real.

But here’s the thing: when she’s with me, she can be perfect. She knows exactly how to make me feel special, like I’m the only one who matters. She’s sweet, she’s funny, she listens to me, and she makes me feel like everything’s going to be okay. When things are good, they’re really good.

But when I think about the times she went back to him, it’s like everything else fades away, and I’m left wondering if I can ever believe her again. I don’t know if it’s me holding on to something that isn’t there or if it’s her telling me all the right things while still playing this game.

I’m tired of the back-and-forth. I’m tired of questioning everything she says.
I don’t know how to make it stop, or if I even want to. But I know one thing for sure: I can’t keep pretending everything’s fine when trust is the thing that’s broken.