Date: April 20, 2025
Author: Alex Carter

I’ve been in university for a year now, and not once have I passed a unit. Not a single one. Yet, I’ve been lying to everyone—my friends, my family, everyone. I told them I was doing fine, that I was keeping up. But inside, I’m drowning.

I didn’t re-enrol this semester. And once again, I lied about it. I told everyone I was “taking a break,” that it was just a little pause. The truth is, I couldn’t face going back. I couldn’t face the failure, the embarrassment. I don’t feel capable of coming clean to anyone. I know it would be the best thing to do, but I can’t bring myself to do it.

I’m exhausted. Mentally, emotionally, physically. It’s like I’m carrying this weight on my back that no one sees. Every time someone asks how school is going, it feels like they’re asking me to reveal a lie I’ve been holding for so long. I’m so tired of pretending, but I don’t know how to stop.

I don’t know what to do next. All I know is, this constant cycle of lying and hiding is eating me alive. And I’m not sure how much longer I can keep it up.