April 24, 2025
I’ve been at my job for a while now, and I’ve always prided myself on being professional, focused, and not really getting involved in anything that could stir up drama. But recently, something happened that has left me feeling totally out of place and, honestly, embarrassed.
It all started when one of my coworkers, another guy, did something that caught me completely off guard. We were all hanging out in the break room, chatting and laughing, when out of nowhere, he blew me a kiss. I don’t know why he did it—maybe it was a joke, or maybe he thought it would be funny. I didn’t know how to react at the time, and I guess, without thinking, I blew one back at him.
The second I did it, I felt my face go hot. I could tell the two female coworkers in the room had noticed, and there was this awkward silence that followed. I tried to brush it off like it was no big deal, but deep down, I was mortified. It wasn’t even about the kiss itself, but the fact that it might have made people question me. What if they think I’m gay now? What if they think there’s something going on between us? That’s not me at all. I’m straight, I know that, but in that moment, I couldn’t help but feel like I had just opened up a door that didn’t need to be opened.
I’ve been replaying that moment in my head, over and over, wondering if I’ve completely messed up my image at work. What if I gave the wrong impression? I’ve always been very clear about my boundaries, my identity, and who I am, but in that split second, I felt like I’d said or done something that left it all in question. It’s frustrating, because I don’t think I did anything wrong, but the fact that I felt embarrassed afterward, the way it made me question myself—it really threw me off.
What’s worse is that now, every time I see those coworkers, I wonder if they’re thinking about that moment. It’s like a lingering question in the air that I can’t seem to shake. I don’t know if they’re laughing about it behind my back or if they’re silently judging me. Maybe I’m overthinking it, but I can’t help it.
The truth is, I’m straight. I’ve never been confused about my sexuality, and I don’t want anyone to think I am because of one dumb moment. I’m not ashamed of who I am, but I do feel embarrassed by how I handled the situation. I should have just laughed it off, made it clear it was a joke, and moved on. Instead, I let the awkwardness sit with me.
In the end, I guess it’s not the kiss that matters. It’s how I responded to it. I just wish I could have handled it differently.
Author: Ben Harper
