Date: April 27, 2025
Author: Chris Hayes

It’s funny how you can invest so much time and energy into something and then realize it wasn’t even worth it. I’m sitting here, trying to process everything that’s happened over the past couple of months, and it’s hard not to feel like I’ve been played the entire time. My ex-girlfriend and I were together for two years. We had some amazing moments, sure, but now all I can think about are the lies, the manipulation, and the fact that she cheated on me multiple times. This wasn’t the first time, but it was the last straw.

She ghosted me after we broke up, just vanished. I tried to reach out, tried to get some closure, but she just ignored me, leaving me feeling completely worthless. I don’t know what hurt more—her doing that to me or the fact that she immediately got together with her side chick. The same girl she’d been lying to me about for months. I can’t even count the number of times I let her lie right to my face, all because I loved her and I didn’t want to face the reality that she was never really mine.

When she graduated, she promised me that we’d make it work. She said she’d wait for me. I was so naive, believing her. But here we are, and it’s obvious now that those words were just a way to keep me around until she was ready to move on. And now she’s with someone else—someone who, like me, probably thinks they’re special to her. But they’ll never know what I know. They’ll never know that I was the one she had no respect for.

After we broke up, I couldn’t just sit back and take it anymore. I met up with one of her friends, and honestly, it felt good to have someone new around, someone who didn’t know the whole messy history. I didn’t plan for it to happen, but we started talking, and things kind of fell into place. Now she doesn’t know, but part of me wonders if I’m doing this out of spite, out of some need for karmic justice. It’s not like I’m completely innocent—I’m not, but it feels like it’s the only way I can get some kind of revenge, even if it’s a little petty.

And then there’s the guilt. I feel terrible. I feel like I’m betraying someone who was there for me, even if it’s not the most ideal situation. I’m just torn between wanting to hurt her back for what she did to me and knowing that I’m doing exactly what I hated her for. It’s this weird cycle of wanting justice and knowing deep down that it’s not going to make me feel better.

I guess I’m just still processing all of it. I loved her, and I let myself be manipulated because I thought it would work out. But now, I’m left picking up the pieces and wondering if it was all just a waste. Maybe time will make it clearer. Maybe one day I’ll stop feeling this strange mix of anger, sadness, and guilt. But for now, all I can do is try to move on, even if I’m not sure how to do that just yet.